What Now?

Now Playing: Kid Cudi - Cudi Zone.mp3* - 11:43 PM.

Lmao, so I just did somethinq so retarded. But I dont reqret it at all, shxt happens riqht?

Ok so you all know about that "special person" in my life riqht? Of courseee you do lol - well he's not that special to me anymore...YEA I SAID IT ! x( And it hurts me deep that I'm actually sayinq it. I never thought that it would come to this lol. But for the most part, I think that it's time for me to CONTINUE qrowinq up, and start movinq on. As you all know me & him been dealinq with each other for some time now...like...a very lonq ass time. Lonqer than im used to - i mean, its not that i have a problem with lonq term relationships, or commitment - I just qet tired of people after a certain amount of time...ya know?
The topic of us "breakinq up" or "takinq our time" has been poppin up alot lately. In his eyes it seems like im beinq "too sensitive."
-___- WHAT THE FUCK. Now when i was a HEARTLESS BXTCH in the beqinninq you were complainq ! And now that i toned it down for you, and try to express my feelinqs (which is a very hard thinq for me to do) then its a problem? GET THE FUCK ! - Uqhh i just want someone to understand where im cominq from in all of this. And he was the one person that actually did in one point of my life, but now its like "ok what the hell?" SMH.

To some people, when they see us toqether in school they seem to think "Aww they're such a nice & happy couple, Always lauqhinq and playinq around, yall are qonna qet married one day, he already qave you the rinq riqht?" WRONG ! That''s what people fail to understand. I mean I dont like ppl all in my business but its just to a point where i want to clear shit up. We miqht be all happy & perfect lookiqn it school, well he miqht. I hide my feelinqs with smiles because i dont want people qettinq the wronq idea. I honestly could care less of what peopel think but YEA WATEVER BLAH BLAH. See now im just ramblinq on about my suckish ass love life and how its fallinq apart as I speak -___- I just thouqht id bloq it about and let my feelinqs out here, before they qet too bottled up and the sliqhtest thinq could make me BURST.

DID I MENTION MY EYES ARE STARTING TO WANDER?! Like...im startinq to be attracted to other quys x( Thats how i KNOW SOMETHING IS WRONG, THAT NEVER HAPPENED !!! I mean i would look at someone & qo "oh yea they kute" But now its like "damn...im kind of attracted to this person.." And then from there I qet bold as hell and APPROACH THAT PERSON ;] lmaoo now anybody that knows me KNOWS I CANT BE THAT BOLD !! Smh oh well. And now this certain person is tryinq to boqaurd his way into my life, because he knows my situation with Terrell. I can feel that SPARK but I dont wanna take thinqs too far, I think i still need to find myself...do some soul searching.
But yea...im qonna end this here before i say too much =/

"Fuck That Shit, Ditch That Niqqa."


Now Playing: Trey Songz - Does She Know.mp3*